My Hunger to Bear (The Everson Brothers Book 5) Read online

  Only him. He did this to me. He’d destroyed any chance I had of finding love with someone else, and all from first base. Kisses. I’d dreamed of them, fantasized about what it would have been like, to feel him between my legs, to have him inside me. To have him love me the way a man did a woman. Endless nights of sweat drenched sheets and guilt ridden fantasies, of him moving above me, in me.

  It had taken everything I had to keep him at arms length, when all my body wanted was to touch him, and be touched. To feel his skin brushing against mine. To explore that huge, muscular body … with my tongue. To ride him until he cursed the air blue, his bronzed skin writhing, slick with sweat as he roared my name.

  His hand slid down to my ass, pulling me against his thigh. Friction rubbed, heat building between my legs, his mouth demanding and taking, never pausing for breath.

  I was higher than I’d ever been before, riding a wave that I hadn’t known existed, everything in my world narrowing down to him. Hard. Determined. Hot. Wet.

  My … mate?

  I shoved him away, chest aching and lips stinging. Blood thundered around my body, tightening my skin until it hurt to move.

  I hadn’t pushed that hard. He had been waiting for me to say no. To reject him. Even now, he watched me without a lick of anger on his face. Concern? Yes. But no towering inferno of rage at being denied.

  My body cried out for him, a mass of aching need, but how could we be together when everything we’d ever known was built on deception and betrayal?

  He took a deep breath, his chest stretching the thin fabric of his t-shirt taut. “Is it because I’m a shifter? Is it that disgusting to you?”

  “No!” In fact, the whole shifter thing wasn’t an issue at all. Fascinating, intriguing, mind boggling—all of those things, but not once had it crossed my mind to be disgusted by it. “It’s because you’re a thief and a liar.” Blunt was good. It was for the best to nip this in the bud.

  His eyes locked on mine, glimmering with a bronze otherworldly flame as they traced my face. Jaw squared, he nodded. “Good. I can work with that.”

  Oh, hell. I’d forgotten how stubborn he was.

  “Start by keeping your promises. Friendship only. Don’t touch me.”

  He scowled, and to my intense disappointment, it only made him look that much hotter. Dark and dangerous. Sinfully sexy.

  “Fine. Until Saturday, babe.”

  Great. We were back to babe.

  Chapter Ten

  Ralph

  She was avoiding me. Every time I entered a room, she skedaddled. Yesterday, she’d melted in my arms, her soft moans beautiful and unfettered. Like fucking music. Ball tightening, tension melting music.

  Then, she’d put her foot down, stomping on my dreams, and insisted I play by the rules.

  Stupid, fucking rules.

  “You okay, boss?”

  Pulling myself together, I cut off the muttered string of curses I was bouncing around the kitchen, catching a glimpse of Tony giving me the side eye. He was used to my temper, having worked in my kitchen for many a year, now, but he still knew to give me a wide berth when I was having a bad day. Slamming my knife down, I gestured at the door.

  Not missing a beat, he yanked off his apron and hightailed it out.

  Didn’t matter. The prep for tonight’s service was all done. He’d be back in time for opening. A tray of cherry muffins sat on the kitchen table, taunting me. They’d been there when I’d come down this morning, freshly baked and still warm from the oven. No sign of the woman who’d magicked them up. Nabbing one, I threw myself into a chair, ripping the top off and stuffing it in my mouth. It tasted like cardboard—no offense to the woman who shall not be named. Everything tasted like cardboard today.

  No sooner had my ass gotten comfortable, I was up, striding out onto Main Street. I could go looking for her. No. Bad idea. Give her some time.

  I wasn’t sure where the hell the sane voice was coming from, it certainly wasn’t my bear as he hadn’t stopped growling and snarling since yesterday, but it was there. Whispering in my ear. Telling me to have faith, that fate would win out.

  Yada yada. Whatever, bullshit.

  My feet stopped without warning. A scuffle and a mutter as someone sidestepped around me. I didn’t care. Where was I going? The muffin had cooled, and was looking a little mangled, so I pulled off another lump and chewed on it thoughtfully. Sliding my cell out of my pocket, I jabbed in a number and hit dial.

  “Ralph?” Jack’s voice came over the tiny speaker.

  “Yup. What’cha doing?” It was a garbled mumble around a mouthful of muffin.

  “Working,” he replied in a voice that said what the hell did you think I’d be doing in the middle of the day?

  “Can I come over?”

  “Now?”

  I nodded, even though he couldn’t see me. There was only one brother I trusted not to make a song and dance out of this, and that was steady and reliable, Jack. The doctor of the family. I was betting I could invoke doctor-patient privilege. In fact, I was counting on it. “Do you have an appointment free?”

  A pause, the sound of papers being shuffled in the background. “I can make time. Can you be here in ten minutes?”

  I looked up, blinking at the sun. “I’m outside now. I’ll wait.”

  “Come inside, I’ll be with you in five.” He hung up, leaving me listening to an annoying beeping sound.

  Pushing open the door to the clinic, I winked at Mrs. Salisbury behind the desk. She nudged her bifocals down her nose, peering at me with friendly suspicion. “Does he know you’re here?”

  Leaning on the chest height partition separating us, I grinned at the elderly woman. “He does. Am I okay hanging with you until he’s ready?”

  Pink tinged her cheeks under the dusting of blush she had dotted on this morning, but she pursed her lips in an approximation of a frown. “You can’t flirt your way around me, Ralph Everson.”

  I held my hands up in the air. “Can’t blame a man for trying.”

  She clucked her tongue, but a smile tugged at the corner of her lips. “Codswaddle. You’re barely out of diapers.”

  I wiggled my eyebrows. “Can I have a lollipop, then?”

  “Stop harassing my practice manager, Ralph. I’d be lost without her and then I’d have to kill you.” Jack’s amused drawl came from my right.

  Giving Mrs. Salisbury another a silent salute, I strolled over to meet him, accepting his hand and a one armed hug with a chuckle.

  “Been a while, bro.”

  He shook his head, motioning me inside his office. “What? A week?” We sat down, him on the other side of what I presumed was his desk, somewhere under the mountain of paperwork that adorned it.

  “A lot’s happened in a week.”

  He linked his fingers together, leaning back in his chair. “So I hear.”

  Hooking my foot over my knee, I grabbed a rubber ball off his desk and rolled it between my fingers. “Yeah, about that—”

  The door sprung open. “Are we having a party?” Max strode into the room, wearing the bottom half of his fireman’s rig and a reasonably clean looking shirt.

  What the fuck?

  I blinked as Ryan and Craig followed him in, Craig nudging the door shut behind him with a sly smile.

  “What? You send out the bat signal, or something?” I muttered, giving Jack the evil eye.

  He grinned. “We made a pact. Whoever you reached out to, called the rest.”

  “I’m here about a medical problem.”

  Shoving over some papers, Ryan sat his ass down on the edge of the desk. “Let’s hear it, then.”

  Craig took the spare chair and Max circled around to take up sentry by the door. It was a motherfucking ambush. All that was missing was—

  A knock sounded on the door.

  Covering my face with my hands, I groaned. “Tell me that’s not—”

  “Hey, Pa.” Craig’s voice was dripping with glee.

  “Great,” I fin
ished, pinching the bridge of my nose. “It’s a fucking family meeting.”

  “I can get your Mom if you’d prefer to speak to her?” quipped Pa, but the threat was real. Spill, or deal with your mother.

  And Mom could be a little … frantic when it came to her boys and their love lives. I knew she only wanted the best for us, but she worried. A lot. And stuck her nose in.

  “Fuck, no.”

  “Then, spill. What’s on your mind, son?”

  “Well, you see, it’s like this, I have a rash on my balls…” I waited. Nobody laughed. Deadly silence. “Okay. It’s Connie.”

  “I fucking told you!” That was Max. I wasn’t sure who it was aimed at, could have been anyone since everyone decided to reply, their voices a low rumble of he said, she said bullshit.

  “Quiet. Let Ralph speak.” Everyone shut up when Pa laid down the law, even five fully grown bear shifters.

  Eyeing the door one last time, I surrendered. I needed their help if I was going to figure a way out of this mess I’d created. “It all started with Connie’s father, a friend of mine back from when I started out, before I made a name for myself.” I laid it all out, not leaving out a single detail, ending with, “So, I bought his business and turned it around, got it back to making a tidy profit again. That was the plan, but I didn’t foresee him catching me with his daughter. I’d meant to tell him, but I had to come clean with her first, so I’d put it off. Anyway, long story short, he caught us together and went ballistic, which triggered a heart attack.”

  “Okay…” Jack drawled, “But, why does she hate you?”

  “She doesn’t— Okay, she does,” I admitted. “I lied to her about who I was. She didn’t know I was the Ralph Everson.”

  “So?” Ryan asked with a frown.

  “Ralph Everson had just bought out her family business. Stolen it out from underneath her very nose.”

  “Ah, I see. And her father revealed your dastardly plan?”

  Shooting Max a withering glare designed to freeze his balls, I grunted. “He told her who I really was.”

  “And then he died,” Craig added, ever the helpful brother.

  “Yup. He told her I’d stolen their business and who I really was—well, not the shifter part, I told her that yesterday—” I ignored the gaping mouths and forged on, “thing is, it wasn’t my plan. I didn’t want his business. It was all his idea. He begged me to help him, then threw me under the bus, and that’s why I can’t tell her.”

  Pa shook his head, disbelief lining his brow. “How do you tell someone their father lied to them on their death bed?”

  “Exactly. She was already devastated. How could I break her heart again?”

  Silence filled the room as we all stared at each other.

  “And now?” Jack ventured with a wince.

  “She still hates me. I either continue to lie to her, but let her remember her father as a good and honest man, or I break my vow to one of my oldest friends, come clean, and break her heart all over again.”

  “Shit.”

  I nodded at Ryan. “Yup. That just about sums my life up.”

  Chapter Eleven

  Connie

  Pink was everywhere. Plus glitter, sparkles, rhinestones, and feathers. Throw in a couple of bottles of bubbly and the squeals were at ear splitting levels. Amy flounced to the center of the room—and I mean flounced—and a collective sigh soothed my poor ears. You could literally feel the estrogen bubbling over.

  Or that could have been the champagne Merrie had just uncorked with ceremony befitting royalty. “To the happy couple!” she declared, raising the foaming bottle to the ceiling.

  “To Amy and Ryan!” we all chorused, raising our glasses and clinking them together.

  Amy spun in a circle, her dress swirling around her ankles and the sighs morphed into appreciative ooooohs. Clasping her hands at her breast, she squealed, setting the group off again.

  Extracting myself from the couch that was determined to hold me prisoner, I made my way over to the small kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water. Downing half in one long draw, I braced myself to go back in. Across the room Gina was chatting with Jeanie, who’d kindly offered her’s and Max’s apartment for the bridal shower, Merrie and Amy were doing some sort of drunken jig involving feather boas and 80’s pop music. Across from the shenanigans sat Mom Everson, or Marie, as I’d just been informed. She wore a serene expression, her eyes dancing with amusement and love as she watched the younger women celebrating. Not that she appeared much older than the rest of us, in her forties, maybe? But it all made sense now.

  Swapping my water for champagne, I took a fortifying sip before clearing my throat.

  The party carried on around me.

  I strode over to the stereo and jabbed at the volume. I cleared my throat again.

  Heads turned my way, Merrie and Amy’s still bobbing to a beat that was no longer blasting us all.

  “I know.” I gave them all a look. The look. The one that said to cut the bullshit and let me into the inner circle.

  “Know what?” Jeanie drawled from where she laid across a chair.

  “Ralph told me about…” I lowered my voice, checking the door was still shut and nobody had snuck in when I wasn’t looking, “shifters,” I hissed.

  “Oh, yay! You know!” Amy bounced over to me and grabbed my hands. “Now I don’t have to worry about putting my foot in my mouth!”

  I allowed myself to be pulled into the throng of excited chatter, ranging from different colors of fur, to dealing with a teething shifter baby. Oh, and the requisite—

  “We’ve all had this discussion, but I’ve got to ask, Connie … is Ralph…?” Amy blushed a pretty pink, though it could have been the alcohol burning her cheeks.

  “Is he what? A stubborn fool?” I caught myself before adding on a couple more choice words, remembering his momma was in the room.

  “That’s my boy,” the woman in question chuckled, catching my eye with a wink.

  “Doesn’t matter,” Amy eventually forced out, her eyes looking everywhere but at momma bear in the corner.

  Marie rose from her chair with the grace of a woman half her age, clucking her tongue. “And that’s my cue to leave.” She waved off the chorus of denials, shaking her head. “Henry is waiting up for me, and I don’t like to keep him waiting.” With a lewd wink worthy of her son, she left us all staring after her.

  “Henry?” Gina voiced everyone’s confusion.

  “Papa Bear,” Marie’s voice called back up the stairs.

  “Oh … right.” Merrie screwed up her face, tugging at a red curl. “I can’t imagine calling him anything but Pa.”

  “Me either,” Amy agreed with a sage nod. She snapped her fingers and performed a little booty dance at the same time. “Right. Ralph. Hung?”

  It took me a second to follow her drunken path. “Hung … oh! Oh…”

  “Come on, don’t hold out on us,” Jeanie added in a sing song voice. Taking a swig of her drink, she grinned at me. Even Gina—usually shy and sweet—was joining in, her hands circling the air in a come on, out with it kind of gesture. I could only hope baby Mae was getting bottle fed tonight.

  “You’ve all … compared?”

  “It’s a well known fact. The Everson brothers are a gifted bunch of son-of-a-bitches.” This was stated by Merrie in a very matter of fact voice and completed with a hiccup.

  “Very.” Gina chimed in with a smug expression. “And I live with a pack of wolves.”

  “Wait, what? Wolves?”

  “Honey, you’ve got a lot to catch up on!” she replied, then proceeded to fill me in about the Colstone and Smithrock wolf packs, and the neighboring jaguar clan. Plus a shifter council. Baby shifters everywhere, including her own two (wolves, she informed me with a proud smile.)

  I sat down with a thump, letting the couch claim me once more. “Wow.”

  “So … is he?”

  I winced, ready to face the music. “I don’t know.”


  Startled, disbelieving faces looked back at me. “But—” Amy stuttered.

  “Ralph is obsessed with you!” Merrie finished. “You can’t tell me he hasn’t stripped naked for you, flexed a muscle or two?” She sounded hopeful.

  “Nope. I take it I’m missing out?”

  “If he’s anything like his brother.” “Attentive.” “Hot.” “Imaginative.” The women spoke all at once, their voices blending together.

  “I’m sure all you’d have to do is ask around. It’s not like Ralph is a monk,” I offered with a chuckle. My laughter trailed off at the look on my friends’ faces. “What?” I resisted the urge to pat my hair or rub my nose. The way they were looking at me…

  “Connie, Ralph hasn’t looked at another woman since returning to Craggstone,” Gina eventually volunteered. “The boys talk, we overhear. They’re worried, what with him being the oldest.”

  “What’s his age got to do with it?” I was having trouble wrapping my head around Ralph being celibate. That didn’t sound one iota like the man I knew. Darkly handsome, he oozed sex appeal the way some men bathed in aftershave. It emanated from him. No way he hadn’t had offers.

  Amy took the seat next to me, taking my hand with a serious expression. “Shifters are meant to find their soul mates. When they don’t, they find it hard to…” Her eyes nearly crossed as she searched for the right word.

  “Stay sane,” Jeanie supplied. “I suppose it helped that he’d already found you.”

  “And now everything’s going be okay!” Amy finished with a happy smile. “Welcome to the family!” She wrapped her arms around me and squeezed me tight.

  I didn’t have the heart to break it to her that her happy dreams of everything turning out okay were just that, dreams. It was her bridal shower, a time of celebration. Pasting on a bright smile, I hugged her back. “Who’s ready to sample some cake?”

  Merrie moaned in her sleep, her snores interrupted for a brief moment as she stretched on the couch, giving Jeanie a swift kick in the process. Jeanie caught her friend’s foot, her eyes bright with mischief. “Shall I?” She extended her index finger, waggling it over Merrie’s poor, helpless foot.